Friday, July 28, 2006

Black white sand

I went to Ramlet el Bayda today.
It is the only free beach in Beirut.
The only sand beach in Beirut.
White sand.
The smell hit me the minute I opened the car door.
The acrid stench of oil. Heavy.Suffocating. Immediatley it gave me a headache. I felt the nausea spread from my stomache to all over my body. The more I smelt it the more dizzy I felt.
They had bombed people, buildings, ports, bridges, roads...everything...and now it was the environment's turn.
As I walked on the sand i could feel the tears welling up.
I couldn't believe what I saw.
I saw black.
The sea is black.
The sand is black.
And it will be black for a long long time.
The oil spill had happened when the Israelis bombed the fuel tanks in Jiiyeh.
And now...what? Hezbollah is hiding divers in the sea?
What will their excuse be?
'It was a mistake...'
'We didn't mean it...'
What?
I saw a crab moving on top of the sand.
The black sand.
It was digging a hole in the black sand.
There was black ontop of its shell.
Where is it to go?
What has happened to all those fish and animals in the sea from this disaster?
Shall we place them on that ever growing list:
-510 civilians killed.
-1850 wounded.
-Over 700,000 persons displaced.
-Massive destruction of Lebanon’s infrastructure.
-Pollution of the sea.
-Death of fish and sea life.
It was not enough to ruin a country....now... also the environment....the sea...already we have heard that this oil spill has reached Syrian shores...and probably it will reach beyond...
So I sat on the beach....watching the black waves crash onto the black sand.
I watched and watched...there is nothing left to say. Nothing left to feel...it was like the final stab...the death blow....
And now...finally...
They took our sea from us...
What more can they do?
What is left?
And as for that poor crab...stuck in a world he didn't ask for...slowly seeing all around him die...we are that crab....we have oil on us...our home is gone...our lives destroyed...our neighbours dead....what will that crab do? Where will it go? How will it eat? What will it eat?
I couldn't keep looking at the sea....the smell was getting stronger and stronger...my dizziness was becoming overwhelming...I took one last look at the sea...black waves crashing...black waves crashing...it was intoxicating...I didn't want to watch it anymore and I couldn't stop looking at it...black wave after black wave...rolling in...white becoming black...white to black....
This is not another story for CNN and BBC...this is our home...our sea...our life...
I wish now I didn't go to the beach. I wish i had remained in my self imposed hope that it 'couldn't be that bad'.
I wish I hadn't seen the truth in front of me today.
I wish I had remained blissfully ignorant.
But since I am no longer ignorant...I want all of you to know...
Close your eyes..and imagine...
Imagine black waves crashing.
Imagine black white sand.
Now open your eyes...
I still see black waves crashing.
I still see black white sand.

Now imagine it happening for the next ten years.

27 Comments:

Blogger la mirza said...

When beards are still entertaining jews

6:37 AM  
Blogger Jarv said...

I went to see a friend in Beirut this february - we didn´t went to the beach ...
Thanks for finding words where I can´t anymore...

8:15 AM  
Blogger Dorothea said...

Dear rena,

trying to express my feelings about what you share with us, I hardly find words. I feel so disgusted, powerless and angry about this what is happening. Who are they to destroy this wonderfull earth and its innocent creatures?
I really pray to our all god that this people experience something, to make them open their hard, and start to see the world through it. So that they learn to respect the life in themselve and around them. So that they start to see the wonders of life we all are surrounded with.
An indian and holly woman named Amma said: "A one-word-solution for the most problems on earth is compassion."
Life gets this wonderfull simplicity, when the hard starts to speak.

I wish you all the strengh you need, to remain your hard open, cause the world is in the need of people as you are.

In love
Dora

3:32 PM  
Blogger Dorothea said...

Sorry,
my english is not so good. Instead of "hard" I certainly meant heart.
Dora

3:39 PM  
Blogger Julia said...

Hey Reza,

I have been reading your blogs every day at the same time, getting worried when you do not post one. Coming from Germany being 30 myself I have never had to worry or think about anything that had something to do with war or let alone I ever felt physically threatened. I remember when I came back from having lived in Africa for 5 years how safe I felt here and how priviliged to be able to not understand why people would want to be violent ot kill each other. Even though I try to inform myself as best as possible I am not really able to judge the situation - what I do know is that war never is a solution and that it will take generations to get rid of violance and anger caused by it.

Is there anything you think we/I could do. What kind of help reaches you or other people and what makes sense?

Julia

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